Muffin’s Olympic Adventure

So Muffin has been missing for a bit.

Wanna know why?

She’s been in China.

Competing in just about every competition the Olympics has to offer.

Despite her fluffy, buttery appearance, those 12,000 calories she fills up on each day come in handy when competing non-stop:

Beach Volleyball:

beach volleyball

Equestrian challenges (nice hat):


Track and Field:




and of course, Gymnastics:


In other news: Amazingly, despite Muffin’s ability to try out, qualify and compete with such rigor in the Summer Olympics, it doesn’t appear that she will be ready to run a full marathon by April’s Country Music Marathon.

Revised Goal: running the half-marathon at the very least.

For the complete Muffin backstory, catch up by reading these posts.

(photo source: The Official Website of the 2008 Beijing Olympics)

Muffin begins to think about the pool

As the hot like the surface of the sun warm weather suffocates settles in over middle Tennessee, I am quickly realizing that my maternity bathing suit – while cute as all-get-out last summer when I was pregnant, is not gonna cut it this year.

So, I have begun the harrowing pursuit of {cue horror music and screaming} The Perfect Suit.

Let’s look at some of my finds, shall we?

1) This just isn’t working for me. I don’t know if it’s the front pocket? The overall straps? The faux men’s underwear opening??

Or maybe it’s THE! ENTIRE! THING!

overall swimsuit

2) There aren’t enough stupid pills in the world to convince me to wear this:

cutout swimsuit

3) This looks like something Ali G/Borat would wear. I feel gross just looking at it.

I’ll be back after my eyes stop bleeding.

plunging swimsuit

4) I think the beach is a scary enough place – what with the jellyfish and the sharks and the thongs. I don’t want to compound it and give little children nightmares.

polka dot

5) This is gorgeous. Perfect. Slenderizing. Love it.

favorite suit

It’s also 350 freakin’ dollars!!! I haven’t spent that much on all of the swimsuits I’ve had since I was 2 years old combined. My husband would lock me up for sure.

Since the suit I found is equivalent to 2 days worth of gas, my search continues. I’m hoping to find something before the pool is drained for the winter.

Muffin prepares for something big

Muffin updates have been a bit quiet around these here parts, as of late. Other parts of life have sidelined attempts to become a mini-muffin. But today you are in luck!

If you’ve missed prior episodes, you can get caught up here:

One of the goals on my list of goals is to run a marathon before I turn 40. People! That is 3.5 years away!

So for that past 2 weeks, I have been doing some research and bugging pestering annoying have asked my husband to join me. He finally relented agreed and so a new journey begins.

Some people will wonder if I got knocked on the head. But, in all truthfulness, it’s just something I have wanted to do. I have an insanely competitive and stubborn streak. That is why I learned to shoot a bow & arrow, fish, take my hunter safety course, and all sort of other tomboy difficult things, as well as give birth naturally, knit, quilt.

So here is how things stand:

  • We are starting by walking. Gotta get the muscles reacquainted with activity.
  • Then we will work in to alternately running and walking for certain distances.
  • Eventually working up to longer distances and times.

I know it will be hard. I know I will cry. I know I will hate my husband for ever talking me into this allowing me to talk him into this. I know my feet will get blistered and ugly.

But I am nothing if not stubborn. And since I have put this out there for every one to hold me accountable on, I know that I will get there.

finishing strong

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Another Muffin update – The fitness quest revisited

Remember this post? The one where I vowed before all of mankind, via the internet, to make some fitness changes so that I could get healthier and evict the muffin-top family that has taken over my waist and hips and chin and arms and thighs?

Let review and update, shall we?

My before photo:

Lifting weight:
Eating Healthy:
Eating sweets in moderation:
Getting enough sleep:Drinking milk:


Stop comparing myself to others:
(you gotta admit… that photo is just goofy!!)

Swimsuit season is right around the corner!! What am I thinking!?

Muffin Falls off The Wagon

So here’s the deal…

Anyone who has been following my blog for awhile knows I have a severely gargantuan sweet tooth thing for sugar. And you also know that when my doctor told me to CUT OUT SUGAR!!! (emphasis his), that I would have rather eaten 50 gallons of pig slop covered in manure happily agreed.

I made my announcement here, because I am an idiot all about accountability. And it worked! I did really really well for a day the first week. But then the weekend came and we went out to eat and I had to have the entire dessert menu to myself a bite of ice cream.

I fell off the wagon.
But I got back up an dusted myself off (before those horses could stomp on me). I promised to get right back into the saddle.

Only, I got tripped up over 20 bags a couple of pieces of Easter candy.

It was a lot harder to get up from that fall. Cement is a lot harder on the derrière than the dusty trail…

But I managed to pull my bruised and battered self up and remind myself that tomorrow is another day (while birdies were tweet-tweeting and baby deer and bunnies gathered around me while I danced and twirled and sang…)

…I promptly plunged headfirst onto the ground once again, when I had an encounter with 2 or 50 a tiny bowl of Banana Pudding at Golden Corral. (have you ever tried that stuff??!!! good luck walking out of there with your dignity intact if you do! seriously, I could bathe in it…)
So I am back to square one. I am standing before you all once again, proclaiming that I will CUT!!! OUT!!! THE!!! SUGAR!!! I am committed to this for sure this time.

At least until we head back to Golden Corral.