My Excellent Fashion Adventure

I was clearing off my camera’s memory card this past weekend and realized that I had left y’all in the dark about some old news recent excitement in my life.

When I was in 5th grade, we were asked to write about the career we wanted to have when we grew up. I chose a lawyer and/or a model (because, like, lawyers on tv are like, sooooo pretty, ya know).

My dream came true (at least part of it) at the end of February when I was able to make a trip to Paris for fashion week. It was exciting and thrilling. Or C’était excitant et saisissant, as my new French friends like to say. The food! The wine! The cheese! The food! Oh, and the fashion… the lovely lovely fashion.

Armed with my camera, I made myself comfortable in the front row of all of the top shows, seated next to Rhianna and Lucy Liu at one, Victoria Beckham and Claudia Schiffer at another.

Look at me, y’all!

I wore this outfit, which I knittedknit witted… knit myself on the flight over. Fussy’s hat is the perfect compliment to any outfit. Thanks, Fuss! (or Foo-say, as my new French friends call her.)

Compared to me, poor Rhianna looked so frumpy… even though she tried to jazz it all up by choosing some grandma shoes.

Of course, I was there only to observe and photograph the models, as I don’t have 2 pennies to rub together right now, let alone pay $10K for the latest styles, no matter how hip and cool they make me. Fortunately, some of my designer friends were kind enough to loan me some fancy frocks to sport around while there.

Here I am doing some site seeing:

Headed out for some dinner and dancing:

Headed out to visit the French countryside:

I took photos of some of my favorite outfits. They are so flattering for any body shape and size. Exactly what I look for when considering what to throw on for a trip to the grocery store. Take a look:

This one will cover that pimple sprouting on your chin or at least draw people’s eyes away from it. You can mix and match all of those pieces for more options. And as an added bonus, I believe I heard someone mentioning that it filters the air before you breathe it in. Isn’t that FAB!

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This one? Perfect for those "fat days" we all have every month. It will hide and conceal any bloating. And see those stilts she is walking on? Adding all of that height will fool everyone and make your body appear proportional!

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Since we wouldn’t be caught dead wearing the same outfit two days in a row, here are two more options for concealing any facial blemishes and/or bad hair.

Ditto for another bad hair day:

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Bloating AND bad hair day:

I must say that I had so much fun traipsing around Paris. It was all so fabulous. There is just so much to love! And on top of it, I looked so cute doing it! Don’t you agree!

So, I may be having to really force myself to fight the frump… but I’ll always have Paris…
Isn’t it grand to pretend to be someone else and paste your head on other people’s bodies be me?

(originally posted march 6, 2008)

Don’t Be a Lipstick Dipstick

In an earlier Fight the Frump post, I explained how to apply lipstick/gloss so that it would last. I never imagined what a hit it would be!

Never one to drop a subject (I was born with that ability, thankyouverymuch), I’m revisiting the topic. Only this time, I have a warning!

It seems as though lip gloss has been in the news a lot recently. First, we were told that lip gloss can help lose weight (sadly, this was debunked). But now, we are being told that lipgloss can cause cancer. When I first heard this, I wanted to crawl in a corner. Not my beloved lip gloss!!??! Say it ain’t so!

A study at Baylor University "discovered that cosmetic lip balms and glosses attract ultraviolet rays, increasing the wearer’s risk of developing skin cancer. In other words, that shiny lip gloss is magnifying the sun’s effects." And even more disturbing, "cancer occurring on the lower lip can be much more aggressive than other forms of skin cancer and there is the potential for spread to nearby lymph nodes." (source)

And that Bonnie Bell Bubble Gum Lip gloss could be frying your lips, setting you up for bigger problems than lipstick on your teeth.

What are we to do? I’m all for looking good, but not at that risk! Shiny lips = oh so lovely. Shiny lips that cause lip cancer = very very bad.

Fortunately, there is an easy workaround: Always apply lip gloss only after applying a 30 SPF sunscreen to your lips.

Do I really neat to repeat myself? Don’t let this happen. Vanity is so not worth this.

And that is so not a look we are going for.

[originally posted May 2, 2008]

Debunking Some Common Beauty Myths

We are all so-called experts on skin care. After all, great aunt Mary Ellen’s best friends mother swore by smearing globs and globs of Vaseline on her face each and every night. And her skin was weathered like a piece of leather perfect, so it must be true.
::come close and let me share a secret:: Would you believe me if I told you that not everything you hear or read is true? (which might lead one to argue that that statement could therefore be false, which would negate this entire post… *ouch* I think I just pulled a muscle in my brain…)
Here are some common myths and what I found out about each.

Myth – Preparation H reduces eye puffiness

yeahokay – NO. In fact, using Preparation H around the eyes can cause dry and inflamed skin. Therefore, you’ll just end up with dry, inflamed, greasy eyes. You’re better off just saving it for your nether region.

preparation h is not for your face

Myth – Your skin pores open and close

A pore is not a door or window – they can not open and close. However, if something is built up in the pore (ie. dead skin cells) the pores can appear enlarged. Go ahead and exfoliate in order to remove that gunk stuff.

Myth – Cucumber reduces eye puffiness

The cucumber itself does not reduce puffiness. But consider this – have you ever heard of someone being referred to as hot as a cucumber? No – it’s cool as a cucumber. Cucumbers are able to stay cold for long periods of time outside of a refrigerator. That cold is what actually reduces puffiness (it causes blood vessels around our eyes to contract, thereby reducing swelling). That being said, you could lay a dirty sock over your eyes and it could help. As long as it is cold.

Myth – Soap is bad for your skin

When soaps contained lye and animal fat, this was true. But newer soaps are less harsh and have good stuff – like moisturizers.

Myth – Vaseline on your face every night will prevent wrinkles?

Petroleum can make wrinkles less apparent by softening lines, but it can’t prevent aging.

Myth – Never pluck a gray hair, because 10 more will grow in its place

Answer me this: If you grow some carrots and pull them up out of the ground, will a bunch more pop up in its place? It’s just not possible.

Myth – Alcohol-free is better
Not all alcohols are drying alcohols. There are also fatty-alcohols. Fatty = emollient. Emollient = softer skin. (examples of fatty alcohols would be cetyl-alcohol, benzyl-alcohol and oleyl-alcohol)
Myth – Cutting your hair and eyelashes once a week will make them grow longer
We’ll believe just about anything, won’t we? Try this one out and you’ll just end up bald.

Are you a Frump Fighter? Share your tips on your blog and link them here.

(originally posted 05.16.08)

Q&A Frump Style

So I’ve got some questions for you. I know from experience, that my readers come out in droves when I ask y’all questions. {I totally love that, by the way} So I know you won’t disappoint.

My questions: (feel free to answer one, all, or stick your tongue out at me)

Do you have a hairspray that you recommend? I don’t want anything stiff. Just a nice movable hold, that might add some volume. (is that even possible?)

Has anyone tried Oil of Olay’s Regenerist? I see it recommended, and winning wrinkle tests, but curious if it really does a good job (skeptical, much?)

Is a professional hairdryer worth the money?

There you go. Opinions? Ideas? Suggestions?

Blogged with the Flock Browser

If you can’t join ’em, beat ’em

Some days, no matter how sassy I’m feeling, no matter how perfectly coifed I am, no matter how carefully accessorized I am, I come across a photoshopped photo of a celebrity that just sends me reeling back into feeling frumpy.

Do you have days like that?

Wanna know a secret?

You’ll never guess.

Most celebs really don’t look like that.

shhhhh. It’s a secret that we aren’t supposed to know.

But I figured it out and I’m here to share it with you.

Wanna feel less frumpy? Take a look at the following photos, and shoo the fumpys away.

{for added fun, guess the celebrities in the comments}

aguileraq celine gwen jolie sandra

photo source: Quirked.com

beyonce

photo source: theLondonPaper

Should you like to try some of the silliness yourself, try Bored.com where you can warp away on some celeb faces.