Archives for January 2012

Fall Down and Get Back Up

I’ve been thinking a lot about the struggles I’ve had in the past with panic attacks and depression, and while I’ve shared small snippets over the years, it wasn’t always easy to come clean about what I was in the midst of.

Now, a couple of years beyond it, I’m able to reflect back on them with some clarity (something that can feel sorely lacking in the midst of that cycle…)

Writing down my stories to share makes me feel vulnerable, and yet, I also feel driven by the sense that there are so many of us affected by these same struggles. Knowing I was not alone was one of the greatest things in the process and in taking steps in my recovery.

As I work through my stories, I struggle for words. I struggle with the memories of what it feels like to go back to that place. I see a person in paralyzing fear and anguish.

Yet, as I continue searching, and wipe the mud and muck from my view, I see someone who fought through it. Who found a Way to understand what was happening.

I no longer suffer from regular panic attacks.

Oh, I feel them knock on my door.
Whisper in my ear.
There are triggers, and I know them well.
They sit waiting for me to be overly tired or stressed.

But they no longer hold me captive.

And that is where I want this chapter of my story to begin.
Because it is worth celebrating.

But the past can’t be forgotten, because there are many others who have fallen and fear that it’s that last time before they can no longer get up.

Don’t believe it.
Don’t listen to those whispers.

_____________

linked up to Just Write

Instagrate for WordPress: not feeling it

So… I took some time to try out the “Instagrate for WordPress” plugin.

Ideally… it would have been perfect.

Unfortunately, all I probably accomplished with it was annoying my readers.

And I apologize!

I share so much of my life via Instagram, and I wanted to figure out a way to share it here, via my blog.

WordPress has made huge leaps in the upgrades to their app and I think it will do what I want, without annoying my readers with lots of random posts.
(*I did ask the plugin developer to create an option to post a ‘daily’ update… and he thought it was a great idea!!! [and THAT, I’d do!!])

So, my apologies for the crazy posts… Although it is indicative of my life, I need to figure out a tidier way to share my chaotic world.

Onward!!

marsala and baby bella mushrooms smell heavenly…

marsala and baby bella mushrooms smell heavenly...

Finally showing 'The Pixar Story' to our artist daughter. She wants to be an animator… #Pixar #Disney #art

Finally showing 'The Pixar Story' to our artist daughter. She wants to be an animator... #Pixar #Disney #art

I love when my 4yo says (and I quote): 'Sit down, and let's have a conversation.' He has his priorities right.

I love when my 4yo says (and I quote): 'Sit down, and let's have a conversation.' He has his priorities right.